


Rain on a Tin Roof - Jack's Bad Day

by SheynaLew



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Light Sam/Jack, MOS Challenge, Silly, Toilet humour, Tumblr Challenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-05
Updated: 2017-10-05
Packaged: 2019-01-09 10:23:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,595
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12274467
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SheynaLew/pseuds/SheynaLew
Summary: Jack's already having a bad day. But when the rain starts to fall he doesn't think it can get much worse. Luckily he has a Carter to distract him.





	Rain on a Tin Roof - Jack's Bad Day

**Author's Note:**

> This is written for the Monthly One Shot challenge on tumblr; "Rain on a Tin Roof"

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It had started with grey clouds, nimbostratus. There hadn't actually been any rain when they left the village, but the ominous darkening of the sky and the electric buzz in the air was an unmistakable indication that, a short time after their departure, they were destined for a thorough soaking.

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Jack had been in a pretty miserable mood to start with, and that was before he'd looked outside the door of the hut they'd been staying in. Two nights on a straw mattress, with a blanket he swore was laced with itching powder covering him, made for one grumpy Colonel. And then, on their final day in the village on P7A-742, right as they were to begin a 10 mile trek back to the Stargate, the skies were threatening to unleash their full fury on them. Typical.

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He should have known. His knee had been acting up all night, further depriving him of sleep. He hated to sound like an old man, but he always knew there was a storm a coming when his knee gave him gyp. "Alright, team, up!" He'd barked at them, leaving no doubt that he was in a foul mood, and that dilly-dallying would not be tolerated. Nevertheless, Daniel had taken his sweet time getting his pack together, and persisted in ignoring Jack's grumbles and complaints, which only further served to darken his mood.

"Daniel we WILL leave without you!" Jack had snapped as the archaeologist tried to force one last artifact on top of his remaining snack bars.

Carter had grabbed it from his hand, shoved it unceremoniously in her own pack, much to Daniel's dismay, and dragged him out of the hut by the scruff of his neck. At least she knew when not to push his buttons, and Jack found his mood brightening just a little. Then he'd stepped outside the hut and his grouchiness had immediately reappeared.

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They'd made it about a mile, Teal'c bringing up the rear in an attempt to force Daniel to pick up the pace, before the first droplet had fallen. Only one or two, and then it had stopped. Still, it had served as a warning of things to come and Jack had called back to his team to get moving.

They had approached the ridge which, whilst perfectly safe when the planet's suns were beating down on it, was nothing short of a slip-'n'-slide in the rain. They'd been warned of the danger by the village elder not long after their arrival, but as the only other route back to the 'gate involved a 3 day detour, Jack had been willing to risk getting a little muddy. Not that he had been happy about it.

The ground had still been solid, and if they could get across it before the heavens opened there wouldn't have been a problem. Jack had gone first, Carter behind him, then Daniel, and finally Teal'c. Jack estimated they had managed to get about half-way across before the rain really started falling.

"Crap!" He had muttered. "Right," he'd called back to his team, "slow and steady. Make sure you have a firm footing before committing or you'll end up at the bottom of the valley."

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More fool him, Jack thought. Of course, after that condescending instruction, to the rest of SG-1 he would be the one to slip off the ledge. His feet had gone under him, he'd landed on his butt, and straight down the hillside into the valley he'd gone, landing, not so gracefully, with his legs round a rather wide tree-trunk. And, boy, if that hadn't been God-damn painful!

As more rain drops had begun to fall, he had felt along his legs for broken bones, and on realising he'd mostly just bruised his pride, he had picked himself up and turned around as his radio crackled to life.

"Colonel?" It was Carter. She had sounded pretty concerned, and Jack had allowed himself a small grin at the knowledge that she worried about his safety.

"I'm fine Carter. Dented ego, and a bad temper, nothing more." He had looked around. About 30 feet in front of him had been a wooden shack with a tin roof. That would do until the rain passed. "Carter, I'm gonna hole-up in some shelter down here until the rain stops. Once it's passed I'll make my way over to the other side of the valley and go the long-way back to the 'gate."

He had waited for her to speak. From the pause, he'd known she wasn't keen on the idea of him trekking 3 days by himself. "Sir, I'm going to send Teal'c back the way we came. He can meet you on your way out of the valley and you can go back to the 'gate together. Daniel and I will let General Hammond know you two will be a bit late."

Jack had wondered exactly when in their careers with SG-1 he'd started letting his second-in-command start giving him orders. Then decided he was too cold, wet and miserable to argue. "Fine Carter." He had grumbled. "Go carefully up there. Radio again when you and Daniel make it to the end of the ridge."

"Yes, sir." He could hear her grinning.

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Jack had pulled himself up, and trudged through the mud to the shack. Luckily for him it was unlocked. He briefly wondered what it was doing here so far from the village before he decided he didn't actually care. Then, as he stepped inside, the smell hit him. Great, he thought, he was taking shelter in an outhouse. And by the stench, a well-used and not very well-cleaned outhouse. Jack resigned himself to the unpleasantness, and turned on his torch. Yep, there was the toilet in front of him, and a basin to the right. At least with running water he could wash some of the mud off his hands. Once they were clean he wiped them dry on his pants and contemplated the toilet. It had a lid. And his legs really did hurt. Screw it, he thought, and sat down, listening to the rain pattering against the tin roof.

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It really did smell bad in here.

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The rain got heavier.

Twenty minutes later he heard a crash. Despite the heavy thudding of the rain outside he grabbed his P90 and ventured outside to be met with a great deal of swearing.

"Carter, what the hell?" He'd demanded.

"I slipped, sir." She retorted.

"You and me both. Where's Daniel?"

"Hopefully waiting on the ridge for the rain to stop, sir. We didn't get any further than where you fell when the rain got heavier. So we decided to wait it out."

"So," he asked, "how exactly did waiting it out turn into joining me for a little tumble?"

She laughed, then blushed, and he immediately regretted saying it.

"You know what I mean, Carter." He tried to suppress a grin. His day was improving slightly. Yes, he was still soaking wet and muddy, and yes he had a three-day hike ahead of him, but he had Carer with him, and three days of making Carter laugh was worth getting a little muddy.

"Reached for my radio, lost my footing." She mumbled, clearly embarrassed.

"Never mind, Carter, we have a lovely little cabin to take refuge in while we wait the rain out, and a nice leisurely walk home." He led the way back to his shed.

"We should radio Teal'c; tell him to go back for Daniel." She suggested.

This day was definitely getting better, Jack thought. Three uninterrupted days with Carter, making her laugh.

"Go ahead Major." He said as he opened the door for her.

She gagged. "Sir... this is a toilet."

"Why yes, Carter, it is. Very astute of you." He grinned at her.

"This is disgusting sir."

"Yes, it is. But frankly, it's drier than outside, and if you hold your nose and close your eyes the rain on the roof is quite soothing."

She pulled a face.

With the door closed they were pressed very close together. He could feel her breath on his neck and smell the lavender shampoo she used in her hair. He smiled.

"You've certainly cheered up since this morning." She grumbled. "Er, sir." She corrected herself.

Jack smirked. "I'm just glad not to be suffering alone, Carter."

"How exactly are we both comfortably going to fit in here, sir?" She asked, turning her head up and immediately looking away when she caught his eye.

"Oh." He had to admit, he hadn't thought about that, distracted as he was by the smell of lavender shampoo which was diverting his nostrils from the reality of their current situation. "Don't take this the wrong way, Carter, but I'm going to sit on the toilet. My knees." He explained, seeing the confused and disgusted look on her face. "You can either stand in front of me, or sit on my knee. Your call."

In the end, she opted for his knee. Probably, he thought, because she was very aware that his eye level if she'd stayed standing was with her crotch. He put his arms around her to steady her, and closed his eyes.

Listening to the sound of the rain on the tin roof, Carter sighed. "You know, if you ignore the smell and the fact we're sat on a toilet, this is actually quite relaxing."

Jack grinned. "Yeah, it is."

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!


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